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Jack needed 50 bucks, so he got into his car
Went down to the sperm bank, where they handed him a jar
Sent him to room number 3, gave him a magazine
Handed him some Handi Wipes said, "Leave the vinyl sofa clean"

He came into a jar
Not into her life
He headed to a bar
He didn’t want a wife

He wanted
Sperm Bank Love, Sperm Bank Love, Sperm Bank Love, Sperm Bank Love...

Jill saw all the babies, said I want one like that
The only picture on my desk is of my cat
So she went down the clinic, thumbed through a catalog
Picked Jack, like all the women, 6 foot, cute and into dogs

Did it with some glassware
Told the doctor, "Make it last"
Dreamed of the sperminator
Pretended they had a past

She wanted
Sperm Bank Love, Sperm Bank Love, Sperm Bank Love, Sperm Bank Love...

Mommy, tell me the truth, How did I come to be?
Why don’t Daddy ever visit, or sit me on his knee?
Growing up this way, it don’t feel like it should
At night I wish for my Daddy to tell me that I’m good

She said:
He came into a jar
Not into my life
He didn’t care ‘bout me or you
Didn’t want me as his wife
I did it ‘cause it was my right
An auto techno love
You were sent by Fed Ex
Not by angels above

(It was a)
Sperm Bank Love, Sperm Bank Love, Sperm Bank Love, Sperm Bank Love...

Jill wanted two thousand bucks, so she got into her car
Drove down to the egg bank, they prepared to make a scar